Probably the worst thing about working at the docks are the pirates. No, not actual, criminal pirates…I’m talking about the cosplayers.

I don’t really know how they have so much time on their hands- must be arts students or something- but anyway, they’re always hanging out here, doing some kind of live role-play where they pretend they’re pirates. And then they go on adventures…ugh, I don’t know. They’ve skirted the edge of stuff that’ll get them banned from the place, but never quite crossed the line. Thing is, the industrial areas aren’t that safe for idiots with no safety equipment. Most of the stainless steel marine fabrication in Melbourne happens right near us, and I’ve seen those idiot cosplayers getting a little too close for comfort. Marine welding just isn’t that safe if you don’t have the proper training. Not that I’ve ever done it- mostly just wanted to go into motor repair myself- but the hazard pay some of those guys get is immense. Props for anyone who’s willing to dangle from a harness and weld a massive ship hull, or…whatever it is those guys make over there. It’s definitely marine fabrication, and there are definitely a lot of sparks involved.

Whatever…if some cosplayers want to escape from their daily lives by dressing up as pirates and pretending they’ve come ashore to chat up tavern maids and drink rum and sing shanties, then…no, that’s still pretty weird. I’m sorry, but it’s true.

I don’t know how they manage it either, since it’s pretty modern around here. They’re chatting in exaggerated accents about hoisting the mainsail, while a few feet away there are people trying to work on aluminium plate boats. Pretty sure they didn’t have those back in the Golden Age of Pirates. Guess I can admire the strength of their imagination…

-Niall

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