Wind and Wheels

Sometimes I have this weird dream where I'm driving along the ocean floor, and it's wonderful. I roll down the window and say hello to all the fish, and sometimes I stop at the drive-through to get myself a delicious smoothie, made from seaweed. It's a se ...

Evil Cars?

Her-Bla has gone too far this time. I’m not even someone who's massively into cars, and even I thought that the Her-Bla Christmas special was way off the rails. Well, I call it a Christmas special, but they never used the words in the show. Not PC enough. ...

Just Anchor Winches

I can’t even keep up with all these cooking simulators. First it was career simulators, and they’re still going strong, but now people are making sims for everything. This is exactly the type of thing that makes the elderly nervous about the coming techno ...

True Home Awareness

I'm starting to think I should write a book or something. Like, I've unlocked a new way of thinking, and I can be one of those people who goes on Six Twee Minutes and tells everyone how to think. And then I'd be that guy who goes into bookshops and offers ...

Cubicle Culprit

Someone has been stealing my desk paraphernalia. It started off with just a pen here, a pad of sticky notes there. Now I’ve discovered that someone has made off with my custom keyboard, along with my in-tray - like, the tray itself, which was a really nic ...

Not My Son

So Billie keeps saying that he’s my brother and that the kid is my son, which is just silly. Billie obviously hasn’t read the script properly, because while there may be some romantic undertones to Mavis’ interactions with the character of Mikhail (tha ...

Wheels Are Important

So, my first mistake was buying a car without any wheels. It'll be a nice little fixer-upper project, the first big 'thing' I ever do in my retirement, that's what I told myself. Everyone is going to be so impressed when they hear that after a single week ...

This Glassy Intrigue

While we're on the subject, I'll add this: "Oh, my glasses!" As in, I need new ones, because I just don't think these 2.0s are cutting it any more. When I jumped on the forum right after the last episode was over, I noticed the screen was a little fuzzy. ...

Plumbing, from Days of Yore

You can tell a lot about a place by how robust the plumbing is. So, so very much. I know this because I come from a long line of plumbers stretching all the way back to the days of Yore. Gore is a period of history that officially extends from the late Me ...

The Art of the Perfect Work Vehicle

Ten years ago, could you have predicted what you’d be doing at this moment? If the answer is yes, then good for you (or not, as the case may be). For me, it’s an ongoing surprise. Not that all the surprises are earth shattering, mind you. Here’s an exa ...